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I started this journey on January 2, 2005, and began this journal about a month later. At first, the purpose of the journal was to track my weight loss progress and all of the issues surrounding my weight. The lesson I learned from that is that my emotions and thoughts concerning my weight affect every aspect of my life. Because of this, I can't put my fitness updates in one journal and the rest of my life in another. The two are parallel to each other and, thus, can't be separated.

Another lesson that I've learned is that by living the motto of walking the walk and "just effin' do it", I am succeeding in areas other than my weight and health. I stick up for myself more and have gone after other things I've wanted. Even though I haven't gotten the job I want yet, I can't say I haven't tried. Even though I haven't moved away from the dependence on my family totally, I have snipped a few strings. I have learned to stop letting life pass me by and just going after whatever it is that I want. If it's not in the cards for me to achieve yet, I am learning to patiently wait. Some things take time to become everything I want them to be; my weight is a prime example of this. Slow and steady is becoming my way of life because every step is a step in the right direction and I can learn a lot more by falling down and picking myself back up over and over instead of having instant gratification and everything just handed to me.

So, from now on, this will be my primary journal.

Walking the walk is more than about my weight loss efforts.

It has become my way of life.

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I am what I am
I am my own special creation.
So come take a look,
Give me the hook or the ovation.
It's my world that I want to take a little pride in,
My world, and it's not a place I have to hide in.
Life's not worth a damn,
'Til you can say, "Hey world, I am what I am."
I am what I am,
I don't want praise, I don't want pity.
I bang my own drum,
Some think it's noise, I think it's pretty.
And so what, if I love each feather and each spangle,
Why not try to see things from a diff'rent angle?
Your life is a sham 'til you can shout out loud
I am what I am!
I am what I am
And what I am needs no excuses.
I deal my own deck
Sometimes the ace, sometimes the deuces.
There's one life, and there's no return and no deposit;
One life, so it's time to open up your closet.
Life's not worth a damn 'til you can say,
"Hey world, I am what I am!"

(La Cage Aux Folles)

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